Nothingness

The melody of life within my body has ceased to play its beat. My metronome heart beats with no song.

My desperate plea to feel better fades to silence as the walls inside of me shatter. I'm dying. The color has been stolen away from me. I'm looking through a thick fog that threatens everything I've ever known. Everything is colorless. I'm left with black and white rays that soon dim to gray and evaporate into nothingness. Everything is colorless.

And I'm no longer begging for warmth, for I feel nothing. It's like that moment during hypothermia where the victim finally feels warm and that's where they really start to worry, because their lips are blue and their breath is jagged and their heart is slow, but they feel quite the opposite.

Fear, laughter, anger, joy, pain...they have all been deceived, for I am a vacant being. I hear nothing, I see nothing, I feel nothing...All I can do is draw the conclusion that there is no hope.

Lord, place me on hands and knees. I want to be begging "please, ease the nothingness in my soul". I want to desire to be.